Wellspring: inspiration and guidance for a spiritual journey

The Wellspring Covenant, by Libby Moore

Our Friday morning Wellspring group met yesterday for the first regular session. The reading assignment was Parker Palmer's A Hidden Wholeness. I am so grateful for having this deep and wonderful book as the focus of our first meeting because it smoothes the way toward our being together with love and caring.

Palmer describes how to be intentional about developing a circle of trust, focusing on listening as much as speaking. He asks us to listen without planning what we're going to say next, to hold a moment of silence between speakers, to allow safe space for the "shy soul" to appear. He says, "… as we are liberated from adversarial speaking and listening, we are much more likely to hear and reflect on things we ourselves have said. Now we have the disarming experience of being taught by our own inner teacher." Operating this way in our circle means trusting that each of us will learn from our own inner teacher. It means no fixing, no advising, no setting the other straight. It means creating a safe space for each of us to hear our inner voice.

It's not an easy task, and the Wellspring covenant helps us create that safe space in our groups. At our opening retreat two weeks ago, we talked about the covenant briefly. Yesterday we talked about it in depth, and A Hidden Wholeness encouraged us to think about what the covenant means to us as individuals and as a group.

Here's what our covenant says:

 

• Ask for what we need
• Help Jen, Libby and Joy facilitate, as appropriate
• Begin and end on time
• Develop a personal covenant that will benefit the person who wrote it (and, we hope, the entire group)
• Do the pre-work
• Listen openly and humbly, not attempting to judge or fix others
• Speak from our own personal experience
• Maintain appropriate confidentiality by telling only our personal stories when speaking outside the group
• Respect and be attentive to Jen's time and role within the group
• Share the air time
• Welcome and encourage humor
• Revisit the covenant, as needed

 

In past years, I've given the covenant less attention, feeling that we would manage to get along fine without having to talk about it. But yesterday's conversation in our group gave me a new appreciation for the value in being explicit about how we are together, for our covenant with each other to do this work and to be together in a safe and loving way. May we continue to build a circle of trust where we can all feel safe and heard.

Good morning from Mary Oliver, by Tina Simson

Landscape

Isn't it plain the sheets of moss, except that
they have no tongues, could lecture
all day long if they wanted about

spiritual patience? Isn't it clear
the black oaks along the path are standing
as though they were the most fragile of flowers?

Every morning, I walk like this around
the pond, thinking: if the doors of my heart
ever close, I'm as good as dead.

Every morning, so far, I'm alive. And now
the crows break off from the rest of the darkness
and burst up into the sky-as though

all night they had thought of what they would like
their lives to be
and imagined
their strong, thick wings

My husband says he hates the crows; their cacophony often wakes us this time of year. And Marty, my dog, certainly doesn’t like them. Once they start squawking he can’t get out of the house fast enough to chase them back into the trees, after which he pees for good measure.

Until recently I went along with that; they are nasty birds, raiding nests and eating road kill. But then they seem to know who they are and without an ounce of hesitance, they claim their world. No apologies, just strong presence, I’ve come to appreciate that.

Making the retreat last, by Tina Simson

I’m always so motivated when I return to my daily life from a retreat or workshop. In the quiet of contemplative hours, I promise myself that I will meditate regularly, invite the spirit of the divine into my life, and be a more open friend and partner. You see, it feels so good to take the time, during a retreat, to reconnect to my inner self and all the rest and wisdom I find there. But invariably as the busyness of my life rushes at me, my best intentions slip away. After a few days or a week, I become discouraged.

Last year when I was a Wellspring participant, I tried something different. I made room in my life for my new commitment. I recognized that I wanted to honor this effort, to make it part of each day and each week. That doesn’t happen unless I take something out. It doesn’t work to say, I’ll get up an hour earlier, or I’ll make time at the end of the day. Giving up sleep and rejuvenation to have time for spiritual pursuits is counter-productive.

As I looked at my list of commitments and responsibilities, I realized that there was no room to put one more thing into the schedule. So my first spiritual practice was ‘cleaning house.’ I prioritized, time with my husband and family was at the top, and then exercise and taking care of myself, then on down the list. What seemed to be at the bottom for me were volunteer efforts. Wow, that was a hard one. As a good UU, these were my lifeblood. But frankly, I was tired and needed to tend to my own soul. So I began, not only to say ‘no’, but also to back out. Something humbling occurred, others stepped in and I left my causes in good hands as I took time for my journey. What a gift and a lesson.

I also let my family know how important this was to me. They picked up some chores and consciously respected my time for Wellspring. And I did one more thing; I created a visual reminder of my commitment and my fellow Wellspring seekers. I found seven small stones in the creek behind my house and arranged them in a circle around a candle. Seven stones, one for each fellow seeker and a candle for the light we created together. I put it on my kitchen counter, right in the middle of my life. I lit it whenever I was home and the soft glow was a gentle reminder of my intentions and my friends and my heart.

So maybe the retreat doesn’t end at the end of the session, maybe it doesn’t end at all when we can find a way to bring it consciously into our daily living.
I wish all 2007-08 Wellspring participants a soulful year.

Namaste

Listening Deeply, by Libby Moore

Our Wellspring retreat on Saturday was a joy – coming together, finally, in person instead of through e-mail. Much as I treasure the convenience of sending off messages into cyber-space (and trusting for the most part that they get where I think they're going), I value even more the faces and voices, the group interaction, the process of listening to one another with attention and love. In the morning we talked about different spiritual practices, encouraging participants in their search for a daily practice that's meaningful and doable. This year we added a new exercise to illustrate yet another spiritual practice - the art of listening, the spiritual discipline of offering our complete attention to the other, listening from the heart without comment or advice or fixing.

Our first reading this year is Parker Palmer's A Hidden Wholeness, where he writes beautifully about allowing the shy soul the safe space it needs. It works well as the first assignment, since the afternoon of the retreat is spent listening to each other's stories, and Palmer's description of being together in a circle of trust reminds us of the need to listen from the heart. But there's another book I recommend as well, one given to me years ago by a Quaker friend. The book is called Listening Spirituality, Volume 1, by Patricia Loring. Every time I go back to it I find new wisdom.

In the chapter on listening as a spiritual practice or discipline, Loring says, "It is a powerful discipline for the 'listener' to try to listen without agenda, without the compulsion to help, abandoning the need or desire to appear knowledgeable, wise, or comforting. There may be no more tellingly difficult spiritual practice than the effort to receive what is being said by someone else hospitably, without editing, without correction, without unsolicited advice."

This kind of listening is easier for some of us than for others. I think of how our normal conversations go – jumping in with whatever comes to our heads, speaking more than listening, waiting for our "turn" to get in our two cents. But in our Wellspring group, we're trying to change that pattern. I know I'm still trying to change it in myself. I was raised in a family where intellectual strength was a virtue. Dinner conversations meant lots of talk and ideas, laughter and friendly argument. I'm still trying to hush the interior voice that wants to interrupt, to get people to listen to my story, my ideas, my memories. I'm practicing listening from the heart, hearing the other person's story without having to interject anything. It isn't easy, but it's worth the effort because I learn so much more this way. My hope for our Wellspring group is that we create a safe space where we can all be heard and where we can all be better listeners as we journey on our spiritual quest together.

Wholeness is not about perfection, by Joy Collins

Over Labor Day I spent 10 days on Cape Cod. I walked the dogs on the Provincetown beach every morning, marveling at the dishevelment the ocean tossed ashore each day. Lots of empty scallop shells, picked clean by the seagulls. But even messier: cracked, fragments of oysters, various clams, snails, crabs and smelly seaweed, a junkyard of the sea. And yet, as everyone knows who’s walked a beach, there was this awesome beauty and peacefulness at the same time.

During the days of these beach walks I was also re-reading the first book of our Wellspring year, A Hidden Wholeness by Parker Palmer. Early on he says, “the wilderness constantly reminds me that wholeness is not about perfection...nature uses devastation to stimulate new growth, slowly but persistently healing her own wounds. Wholeness does not mean perfection: it means embracing brokenness as an integral part of life. Knowing this gives me hope that human wholeness – mine, yours, ours – need not be a utopian dream, if we can use devastation as a seedbed for new life.”

As I think about our kickoff Wellspring retreat coming up this Saturday, I take comfort in my beach memory as well as Palmer’s words. I so strive for and worry about not attaining perfection. What if this new group doesn’t like me? What if people don’t show up? What if the new listening exercise bombs? What if, what if…Apparently, I still have perfection confused with wholeness!

I like a meditation suggested by Judith Hanson Lasater in her book, A Year of Living Your Yoga:

“What do you want: perfection or wholeness? Often we strive for perfection. But perfection is unattainable, and striving for it limits us. Today sit quietly for a few minutes. As you breathe, imagine becoming a large container within which to hold your perfection and imperfection. When you can hold both, then you experience your wholeness.”

I will try to keep her words in mind as we welcome and embrace a new batch of folks for Wellspring. May we become a large container for one another!

A trip to the dollar store, by Tina Simson

My husband went to the dollar store last week. He’s a high school science teacher and this time of year he is getting school supplies just like the kids. He came home with bags full of ‘stuff’ and he was tickled at the plethora of goodies at such a low price. The availability of all these treasures got his creative juices flowing and even though I’m not sure he knows what he’s going to do with a pound of balloons, aluminum foil, bungee cords and sponges, I’m confident his students will be delighted with his results. They don’t call him, Mr. Blow Stuff Up, for nothing.

Joe’s trip to the store made me think about all the accoutrements of a spiritual journey and whether there was a dollar store for spiritual items. I remembered the vending carts at the Vatican with plastic rosary beads and Pope fans to keep you cool and holy inside the basilica. But we UU’s don’t go in for all that. All we need are a few candles and a fountain, and a fancy journal and some really cool pens. Then there are CD’s with music and chanting and books. We UU’s do love our books. And the message is: if we have all these things, our spirit will soar, right? No, not so much.

Throughout my experience of Wellspring and over my years as a spiritual seeker, I find my “spiritual dollar store” in many odd places, in the woods, on the ocean, in a noisy busy subway station, in a dark moonless night, in the doctor’s waiting room, and in the supermarket or classroom, at my family table. I’ve learned that the place we must prepare for this journey is not an external altar but is in our heart, and the supplies are offered each day in our interactions and our observances. The key is to open our eyes, which then opens our soul. I believe we need to look out at our world and at each other in order to see in.

So light a candle then go shopping in your own life for the supplies you need and I wish you, bon voyage.

Prayers for peace on September 11th, by Tina Simson

As we remember all who perished in their innocence and in their dedication to serve, and as we mourn the loss of our soldiers and the sorrow of their families let us not forget that the pain of this tragedy touches people across the world.

Let us remember the Iraqi’s who have died and continue to suffer daily and the tragedies of the people of Afghanistan. Let’s remember the victims of terrorism in Spain and England and Beirut and Israel.

And let us remember that the world’s religions have given us the words to speak when it seems impossible to utter meaningful words. From The Gift of Prayer

A Jewish Prayer for Peace “Come let us go up to the mountain of the Lord, that we may walk the paths of the Most High. And we shall beat our swords into plowshares and our spears into pruning hooks. Nation shall not lift up sword against nation-neither shall they learn war anymore. And none shall be afraid…”

A Christian Prayer for Peace
“But I say to you that hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the sons and daughters of God.”

A Baha’i Prayer for Peace
“Be generous in prosperity and thankful in adversity…be a lamp unto those who walk in darkness and a home to the stranger. Be eyes to the blind and a guiding light unto the feet on the erring. Be a breath of life to the body of Human-kind, a dew to the soil of the human heart, and a fruit upon the tree of humanity”

A Muslim Prayer for Peace
“In the name of Allah, the beneficent, the merciful. Praise be to the Lord of the Universe who has created us and made us into the tribes and nations, that we may know each other, not that we may despise each other.”

A Unitarian Prayer for Peace
May we have the courage and conviction to honestly engage the difficult questions; 
to speak hard truths, 
to accept our responsibility to each other and the world. 
May we find the strength and vision to end the cycles of violence.

Imagine for a moment if UN Peacekeepers entered a country armed with medicine and clean drinking water and books and hammer and nails and open arms.

Too busy for God, by Tina Simson

I’ve had a very busy month with lots of excuses to avoid my spiritual practice. They’re all legitimate, my sons needed help with life transitions, I babysat my granddaughter, I’m looking for a new way to make a living, as in a ‘job’ and my aging dog has been having problems. My husband, a teacher, has been home for the summer and while he is very respectful of my alone time, he seemed to be under foot. So with a deep breath and an empty house on the first day of school, I reclaimed my space and my god.

To my surprise, all was as I left it. Standing directly beside me was all the grace and wonder and deep essence of spirit. How easy to slip back into a beauty of mindfulness and awe. How easy to rest in this place that is only mine. But it wasn’t always this way; I often resisted going back to my practice. I would spend time and energy wondering why I left. What was wrong with me that I couldn’t keep this going? Thinking that I should engage in ‘prayer’ even when I didn’t feel like it, you know kind of like exercising and eating right! In some bizarre twist my recrimination became my practice. I tended to my soul by giving myself a hard time. Ok, so that doesn’t work.

It was my spiritual director who said, “You have to get to neutral.” He meant rather than seeing my adherence to a spiritual practice as good or bad, merely accept is as part of living, sort of like breathing. I don’t judge myself on the quality of my breathing. If I hold my breath, I’m pretty sure I will breathe again soon. I don’t rant at myself for breathing too quickly or too slowly, I trust myself when it comes to breathing. It’s not that I don’t believe that it is important to commit to a daily spiritual practice, but I have to pay attention to what pulls me away. If ranting and judging myself in my internal conversation takes the place of sitting in quiet meditation, well that’s something to note. As my wise director said, get to neutral. Know that life will pull you away, that some days you would rather rage at the moon than sit in prayer. But if I’m really at neutral, then it is what it is, and patience with myself is the best lesson. With a quiet, open and forgiving heart you can slip back into your practice like a beloved pair of cozy slippers.

Two resources to help you find your way back to a UU spiritual practice can be found at the UUA Bookstore.

Everyday Spiritual Practice

Simply Pray

Namaste